Episode 10
How to heal your Anxious Inner Child [Ep 10]
In this episode, join me as we explore the profound connection between the inner child and anxiety. We dive into what the inner child is, how it influences our present-day experiences, and why it matters in our journey towards healing from anxiety. Through real-life examples, we uncover the roots of anxiety in childhood experiences and offer insights for navigating inner child work. Plus, don't miss the exciting announcement about a 12-week free-from-anxiety program designed to empower women to heal from anxiety and reclaim their peace of mind.
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DISCLAIMER: All content here is for informational purposes only. This content does not replace the professional judgment of your own mental health provider. Please consult a licensed mental health professional for all individual questions and issues.
Transcript
You're listening to the Peace With Anxiety Podcast.
Speaker A:I am your host, Irene Evangelo, anxiety counselor and clinical hypnotherapist.
Speaker A:I'll be coming to you every week to share actionable tips, simple strategies and useful resources to help you break free from high function anxiety.
Speaker A:We'll be covering how to recognize and understand your anxiety, strategies to change your thoughts and feelings, ways to implement long lasting change.
Speaker A:If you are trying to overcome people pleasing behaviors, navigate anxiety, living in self doubt or something else keeping you stuck,
Speaker B:then you are in the right place.
Speaker A:I know that you are ready to get to the next level of your life feeling free, calm, confident and in control.
Speaker A:So let's get started.
Speaker B:Foreign.
Speaker B:Hello and welcome Back to episode 10 of the Peace With Anxiety Podcast.
Speaker B:In today's episode we are diving into a fascinating aspect of anxiety and that is the role of our inner child.
Speaker B:We will start with explaining what is the inner child, how it relates to anxiety, and how it shapes our daily behaviors and feelings.
Speaker B:And I want to start by asking you to think back to your childhood.
Speaker B:Remember those moments of joy, but also the times of sadness, fear and loneliness.
Speaker B:Well, those experiences are not just distant memories.
Speaker B:They are the building blocks of who we are today.
Speaker B:You see, each one of us has an inner child, a part of ourselves that carries the hopes, fears, dreams and wounds of our childhood.
Speaker B:And here, where it gets interesting, our inner child doesn't just fade away as we grow older.
Speaker B:Instead, it stays with us, influencing how we perceive and respond to the world around us, even into adulthood.
Speaker B:And sometimes that influence can manifest as anxiety.
Speaker B:So think about it.
Speaker B:Have you ever found yourself reacting to a situation in a way that felt disproportionate to the present moment?
Speaker B:Maybe you felt a surge of fear or unease that seemed to come out of nowhere.
Speaker B:Well, chances are that your inner child was at the helm, responding to that present day experience based on past hurts and insecurities.
Speaker B:So understanding the connection between our inner child and anxiety is the first step towards healing.
Speaker B:By acknowledging the role of our past in shaping the present, we can begin to uncover the root causes of anxiety.
Speaker B:Reclaim our peace of mind so how do we recognize when our inner child is calling the shots?
Speaker B:Well, pay attention to those moments when your emotions feel especially raw or intense.
Speaker B:Notice any patterns or triggers that seem to set off your anxiety, and above all, approach yourself with kindness and compassion.
Speaker B:Your inner child deserves to be heard and understood, not dismissed and ignored.
Speaker B:So as you listen to this episode, I can understand that it may seem a bit cringy or weird talking about Our inner child.
Speaker B:But I would like to invite you to keep an open mind to this idea of an inner child.
Speaker B:And let's see how it relates to anxiety and why it may benefit us to recognize its impact in our daily lives.
Speaker B:So stay tuned, my lovely listeners, as we continue to explore the profound connection between our inner child and anxiety.
Speaker B:So picture this.
Speaker B:You're going about your day.
Speaker B:Everything seems fine.
Speaker B:But suddenly, out of nowhere, anxiety pops up.
Speaker B:You feel that familiar knot in your stomach, your racing thoughts, sweaty palms, clenched jaw, and the overwhelming sense of dread.
Speaker B:But you're thinking, why now?
Speaker B:What triggered this anxiety?
Speaker B:Well, sometimes it can be your inner child telling you, hey, I'm still here, and I've got some unresolved stuff to deal with.
Speaker B:You see, our inner child is an active participant in our present, carrying all the emotional baggage from our past experiences into our adult lives.
Speaker B:So those moments of joy, but also the pain, the trauma, the heartache, they all leave their mark on our inner child, shaping how we perceive ourselves and how we perceive the world and how we respond to everything.
Speaker B:This reaction comes from a time when we lacked the tools and understanding to cope with this distressing situation.
Speaker B:So when something in the present triggers those old wounds or unresolved emotions, your inner child responds often with anxiety, as if the past is happening all over again.
Speaker B:That's why seemingly insignificant events can sometimes evoke such strong emotional reactions.
Speaker B:It's not just about what's happening right now.
Speaker B:It's about what happened then, too.
Speaker B:But here's the thing.
Speaker B:By understanding this connection between our inner child and our anxiety, we can begin to heal.
Speaker B:We can start to recognize the signs of our inner child's influence.
Speaker B:The patterns, the triggers, the moments when our reactions feel out of proportion to the situation at hand.
Speaker B:And once we recognize those patterns, we can begin to make sense of them, to separate the past from the present and to reclaim our peace of mind.
Speaker B:And it's not an easy work, but it's really worth doing it.
Speaker B:So I want to encourage you to reflect on your own experiences.
Speaker B:When has your inner child made an unexpected appearance in your adult life?
Speaker B:What triggers tend to set off your anxiety?
Speaker B:You see, our childhood experiences are like the building blocks of our adult selves.
Speaker B:Whether they were moments of joy and love or times of pain and struggle, they all leave a lasting imprint on our minds.
Speaker B:From the way we see ourselves and others to how we cope with stress and challenges, our childhood experiences shape our beliefs, feelings, behaviors, and reactions to the world around us.
Speaker B:Whatever your memories may be, they've all played a Part in shaping who you are today.
Speaker B:But here's the thing.
Speaker B:It's not just about the big dramatic moments in your childhood that left a mark.
Speaker B:Even seemingly small events can have a profound impact on your development.
Speaker B:A harsh word from a teacher, feeling a rejection from a friend, or the absence of a supportive parent.
Speaker B:All of these experiences contribute to how we view ourselves and the world.
Speaker B:Now, you might be wondering, what does this have to do with anxiety?
Speaker B:Well, it's kind of all connected.
Speaker B:You see, when your inner child encounters a present day trigger that resembles a past experience, it reacts as if the past is happening all over again.
Speaker B:So those old wounds reopened and you may find yourself caught in a cycle of anxiety distress.
Speaker B:So take a moment now and think of your own childhood experiences.
Speaker B:What moments stand out to you?
Speaker B:How have they influenced the way you perceive yourself and the world around you?
Speaker B:How do they affect your relationships?
Speaker B:Alright, let's break it down even further.
Speaker B:At the root of many of anxiety issues often lies a hurt inner inner child with unmet needs, unresolved wounds and invalidated emotions.
Speaker B:Okay, picture a child, any child, all it wants is to be loved, seen, heard and acknowledged.
Speaker B:Every child is completely dependent on the adults around it.
Speaker B:So these needs go beyond just food and shelter.
Speaker B:They include emotional support, validation, and a sense of safety and belonging.
Speaker B:Now, what happens when these needs are not met?
Speaker B:Let me give you some examples.
Speaker B:Imagine you're a child who craves love from your parents, but instead you're met with criticism and disapproval at every turn.
Speaker B:No matter how hard you try, it never seems to be enough to earn the praise or affection.
Speaker B:This constant rejection leaves you feeling unworthy and unlovable, making you feeling insecure about yourself and and doubting yourself.
Speaker B:Or perhaps you grew up in a household where emotional expression was rare and vulnerability was seen as a sign of weakness.
Speaker B:You learned to bury your feelings deep down, putting on a brave face even when you're hurting inside.
Speaker B:But those buried emotions don't just disappear.
Speaker B:They just stay hidden and resurface as anxiety when faced with situations that require emotional openness and vulnerability.
Speaker B:Now, let's consider a different scenario.
Speaker B:Imagine you're a child who witnessed frequent arguments and conflicts between your parents, leaving you feeling scared and powerless.
Speaker B:You learn to tiptoe around their unpredictable moods, never knowing when the next outburst might occur.
Speaker B:This constant state of hypervigilance and uncertainty becomes your baseline, leading to a heightened anxiety in adulthood as you struggle to feel safe and secure in your relationships and continues to shape your thoughts, emotions and behaviors as adults.
Speaker B:And these are just a Few examples of how unmet needs and unresolved wounds from childhood can manifest as anxiety in adulthood.
Speaker B:Whether it's a lack of love and validation, a history of trauma and neglect, or an environment characterized by chaos and instability, the anxiety becomes a coping mechanism to keep you safe from danger.
Speaker B:So you are always in high alert.
Speaker B:So here's where it gets really interesting.
Speaker B:These unmet needs and unresolved wounds can act as triggers for anxiety.
Speaker B:When something in your present day life resembles a past experience where your needs weren't met, your inner child responds with fear, insecurity, or a desperate need for control.
Speaker B:For example, let's say you experienced rejection from a caregiver as a child, a parent who was emotionally distant or unavailable.
Speaker B:You wanted their love and attention, but no matter what you did, it never seemed to be enough to earn their affection.
Speaker B:Now, as an adult, you find yourself constantly seeking approval and validation from others.
Speaker B:Or you strive for perfection because you might be afraid of being abandoned all over again.
Speaker B:You bend over backwards to please people, putting their needs before your own, all in a desperate attempt to fill that void left by childhood rejection.
Speaker B:But deep down, you still feel that you're unworthy of love and acceptance, which causes you more anxiety and self doubt.
Speaker B:Or perhaps you grew up in a household where conflict was a norm, a constant battleground between your parents.
Speaker B:Their arguments were loud and frequent, leaving you feeling scared and helpless.
Speaker B:So you learned to associate confrontation with chaos and pain.
Speaker B:And as a result, you developed a deep seated fear of conflict.
Speaker B:So now you avoid confrontation at all costs, going to great lengths to keep the peace and maintain harmony in your relationships.
Speaker B:But this avoidance only serves to suppress your true feelings and needs, leading to underlying anxiety and resentment.
Speaker B:But here's the good by uncovering these underlying factors, we gain a greater understanding of why we react the way we do and how we can begin to heal.
Speaker B:So let me ask you what unmet needs or unresolved wounds from your childhood stayed with you?
Speaker B:How do they show up in your thoughts?
Speaker B:In your feelings and behaviors as an adult?
Speaker B:Now, I know that getting in touch with your inner child and addressing past wounds can feel scary to say the least.
Speaker B:However, when we understand our inner child, we then begin to understand why we sometimes respond in a non logical, out of proportion way to the events in our current lives.
Speaker B:This work is transformative and powerful and I love working in this way with my clients because they begin to see that anxiety is not the problem.
Speaker B:They begin to see anxiety as a very small, scared, vulnerable child.
Speaker B:And once they do that, They begin to relate to that young child in a compassionate way.
Speaker B:So anxiety is no longer this massive scary thing, but it becomes an expression of the underlying root cause which usually comes from these unmet needs.
Speaker B:So feeling not enough, not feeling worthy or lovable, and that constant fear of never having what we want.
Speaker A:Now, as a therapist, I give my
Speaker B:clients lots of strategies to regulate their nervous system.
Speaker B:However, in order to stop feeling overwhelmed by the anxiety, the inner work is of utmost importance because every tool is undoubtedly useful and beneficial, but it doesn't address the root cause of anxiety.
Speaker B:This can only be done with therapy.
Speaker B:So it's really important to look at the root cause of anxiety, regulate our nervous system and understand why there is a part of us that is triggered when feeling anxious.
Speaker B:So for today's practice I would encourage you to seek professional help from your own therapist.
Speaker B:You do not have to be alone in this journey.
Speaker B:A therapist can help you navigate the inner child work so you can finally begin to heal and become free from anxiety, calm and confident.
Speaker B:And if you don't have one, feel free to contact me by booking a free 30 minute call.
Speaker B:And before you go, I have an exciting announcement to share with you.
Speaker B:I am currently seeking five women who are so done with anxiety and self doubt holding them back from living life to the fullest.
Speaker B:So if you're ready to rapidly shift your thoughts and feel feelings that keep you stuck.
Speaker B:If you're ready to create unstoppable self belief and unshakable inner confidence.
Speaker B:I have a 12 week free from anxiety program and I can only take five women who are ready to heal from anxiety and are fully committed in investing in themselves.
Speaker B:We are going to uncover the root cause of anxiety and heal your inner child.
Speaker B:And I give you strategies to reduce stress and regulate your nervous system in the 12 week RTT program.
Speaker B:If that sounds like something you want to do then please use the link in the show notes to apply for the program.
Speaker B:Don't let anxiety hold you back any longer.
Speaker B:Take control of your journey to healing empowerment today.
Speaker B:Thank you for listening.
Speaker B:Until next time, take care and be kind to yourselves.
Speaker A:Thank you for listening to the Peace With Anxiety podcast.
Speaker A:If you found any value in today, I would really appreciate if you would leave me a review and share this episode on your Instagram story tagging me at Irene the Unseen Anxiety Therapist.
Speaker A:Also make sure you subscribe to this podcast so you don't miss an episode.
Speaker A:All the links are found below in the show notes.
Speaker A:Thank you for listening and I look forward to seeing you the next episode.
