Episode 30
Pause Before You Panic: A Simple Trick to Tame Your Anxiety
Today, we’re diving into the transformative power of pausing before we react, a game-changer for anyone dealing with high-function anxiety. I’m sharing a straightforward practice that can help interrupt that instinctive, anxious response we often have when faced with stressors, whether it’s a text or a sudden change of plans. By taking a moment to pause, we allow our brains to catch up and choose a more intentional response instead of reacting out of panic. I’ll guide you through a simple step-by-step process to implement this pause in your daily life, along with a grounding exercise to help you centre yourself. So, if you’re ready to take a breather and regain control, let’s get into it!
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DISCLAIMER: All content here is for informational purposes only. This content does not replace the professional judgment of your own mental health provider. Please consult a licensed mental health professional for all individual questions and issues.
Transcript
You're listening to the Peace with Anxiety podcast.
Speaker A:I am your host, Irene Evangelo, anxiety counselor and clinical hypnotherapist.
Speaker A:I'll be coming to you every week to share actionable tips, simple strategies and useful resources to help you break free from high function anxiety.
Speaker A:We'll be covering how to recognize and understand your anxiety, strategies to change your thoughts and feelings, and ways to implement long lasting change.
Speaker A:If you are trying to overcome people pleasing behaviors, navigate anxiety, living in self doubt or something else keeping you stuck, then you are in the right place.
Speaker A:I know that you are ready to get to the next level of your life feeling free, calm, confident and in control.
Speaker A:So let's get started.
Speaker B:Hello and welcome back to Peace with Anxiety.
Speaker B:Today I want to share one of the simplest but most powerful tools I keep coming back to and that is pausing before you react.
Speaker B:And if you live with high function anxiety, as I have for many years, you know how quickly a small thing can feel like a major crisis.
Speaker B:That could be a short text, a tiny change of plans, a comment from a family member, and immediately your body tightens.
Speaker B:First your shoulders lift, then your chest gets tight, then your thoughts speed up and before you know you've said something or done something from that place of panic.
Speaker B:So this episode is just a short practice to help you stop that loop and I'll talk you through the idea, give you a step by step way to do it, and then we'll finish with a small grounding exercise that you can take into your day.
Speaker B:Alright, so the first thing is why pause?
Speaker B:Reacting instantly keeps your nervous system in overdrive when you jump to fix or defend or explain.
Speaker B:You teach your body that the fast anxious reaction is the only option.
Speaker B:But pausing creates this tiny gap that is enough for your brain to catch up and for you to choose how you want to respond.
Speaker B:So if that sounds good, here's a simple step by step way you can use the next time when you feel that spike in anxiety.
Speaker B:So step one is to notice the trigger when you feel that tightness in your chest, the rush of heat or the air to send or reply right away, stop, stop immediately, literally stop and notice it and say to yourself, this is my anxiety reacting.
Speaker B:That's it.
Speaker B:The first step, that small label creates a little distance between the feeling and the reaction.
Speaker B:Now step two.
Speaker B:Take a deep deliberate breath.
Speaker B:Slowly inhale for four counts, hold for four.
Speaker B:And now exhale for six.
Speaker B:And if you feel comfortable, we can do it right now.
Speaker B:So breathe in.
Speaker B:Hold, breathe out.
Speaker B:Nice.
Speaker B:Now one more time.
Speaker B:If you feel Comfortable.
Speaker B:Breathe in.
Speaker B:Hold.
Speaker B:Breathe out.
Speaker B:Perfect.
Speaker B:That one breath can be enough to move you out of immediate fight or flight and give your thinking brain a second to show up.
Speaker B:Now that was step two.
Speaker B:Step three Ask yourself a simple what do I actually want to say or do not what your anxiety wants you to fix.
Speaker B:Not what's quickest, but what you want or what aligns with who you want to be.
Speaker B:Now, this question shifts you from the autopilot.
Speaker B:The choice, and then step four is to respond intentionally.
Speaker B:If it's a text, you might wait and write it later.
Speaker B:If it's a conversation, you can say something like I need a moment to think about that Or Can I come back to this in 15 minutes?
Speaker B:These short, honest pauses are adulting at its best.
Speaker B:Calm, collected and thoughtful.
Speaker B:And the little tip here is that pausing is not about suppressing how you feel.
Speaker B:That's really important.
Speaker B:It's about giving your nervous system space.
Speaker B:So your response comes from who you actually want to be, not from a tighter, more reactive version of yourself.
Speaker B:And every intentional pause is a vote for your self trust.
Speaker B:Alright, let's do a little something together so you can feel the difference in real time, wherever you are.
Speaker B:Gently bring your attention to your body.
Speaker B:And if you can, place a hand on your chest or your stomach, whichever feels more comforting.
Speaker B:Take a slow breath in through your nose for four, hold at the top for four and exhale for six.
Speaker B:Now let your shoulders drop a little, relax the muscles around your eyes, soften your jaw.
Speaker B:And now silently say to yourself, I get to pause, I get to choose.
Speaker B:I'm allowed to take my time.
Speaker B:Now stay here for one more slow breath.
Speaker B:In for four, hold and out for six.
Speaker B:Good.
Speaker B:Now after that, we will check our senses silently.
Speaker B:We will notice and name one thing for each.
Speaker B:And that is one thing you can see right now, one thing you can hear, and one thing you can feel against your skin.
Speaker B:And it doesn't have to be something really profound.
Speaker B:Just name the obvious.
Speaker B:Like, I can see the light on the wall, I can hear the hum of the fridge, I can feel my feet on the floor.
Speaker B:But naming these anchors brings your attention out of the story and back into your body.
Speaker B:So feel free to notice your senses.
Speaker B:One thing you can see, one thing you can hear, one thing you can feel against your skin.
Speaker B:And if you practice that, in a moment of stress, notice how the edge softens even a little bit.
Speaker B:And that little softness is important because that is your nervous system learning to relax.
Speaker B:Now, before we finish today, I want you to check in with yourself Just for a moment, think about one place in your life where you tend to react fast.
Speaker B:Maybe it's with work emails, maybe it's with family.
Speaker B:Maybe it's when someone's tone shifts.
Speaker B:What would it look like to add a tiny pause there?
Speaker B:Just a moment of space that wasn't there before.
Speaker B:Not perfection, not a brand new personality.
Speaker B:Because you don't need to fight your anxiety.
Speaker B:You just need to meet it with a little more compassion and a little more choice.
Speaker B:And I promise, these tiny pauses, they do add up.
Speaker B:And if it helps, try this simple challenge.
Speaker B:So for the next three days, when something triggers, you pause and breathe once before you react.
Speaker B:And that's it.
Speaker B:No pressure.
Speaker B:Just three days and one breath.
Speaker B:Each time, notice what changes.
Speaker B:Because you don't have to eliminate anxiety.
Speaker B:That's not the point.
Speaker B:The point is to give yourself tools so anxiety doesn't always drive the car.
Speaker B:Each pause is a tiny reset.
Speaker B:Each reset builds trust within yourself.
Speaker B:So thank you for doing this with me and for showing up today and that really matters.
Speaker B:I will see you in the next episode for another short tool from my high functioning anxiety survival guide.
Speaker B:And if you want the written version of this tip, I'll pop the link in the show notes.
Speaker B:Until next time, take care and be kind to yourself.
Speaker A:Thank you for listening to the Peace With Anxiety podcast.
Speaker A:If you found any value in today, I would really appreciate if you would leave me a review and share this episode on your Instagram story tagging me at Irene the Anxietytherapist.
Speaker A:Also, make sure you subscribe to this podcast so you don't miss an episode.
Speaker A:All the links are found below in the show notes.
Speaker A:Thank you for listening and I look forward to seeing you the next episode.
